Starting any new project can be- intimidating. There is no direction to follow, no habits to fall back into, and most importantly- no expectations with which you can place blame.
In honesty- it is, what it is- a blank slate. Something that can be whatever you want it to be.
Don’t worry- I won’t be tripping the light fantastic or using “azure” instead of blue. While I may wax poetic from time to time- I honestly just want this to be real.
To explain the title of this first post- my boss, Brandon, had pulled me in for my monthly coaching and had asked me what my goals would be for this year. I honestly wasn’t prepared when he first told me he wanted a list. I hadn’t been asked to do anything like that in a job before. So I spent a little time and came up with what I thought was a reasonable list of goals.
- Code an entire site in flash
- lose the last 35lbs
- develop a reputation at work, and work towards becoming a depended upon “marquee” player.
- Use my creativity
The first four were easy- work on my flash, just do some more tutorials, and apply that towards a site- there are a million tutorials to pull from out there. Same with the JS- so many sources- the hardest part is figuring out where to start. The weightloss is easy enough- I have already lost a ton of weight- it’s just getting motivated to hit the home stretch- put in the activity and reign in the nutrition.
As for the reputation- I have a big personality. And a very strong one- it can be very polarizing. People tend to love me or hate me. I just had to focus on learning to use my personality properly and focus on being the type of employee I wanted to be seen as.
But, the creativity … that’s the tricky part. I have always been a creative person- since I was a kid in fact. I loved doing my horrible paintins and drawings. And anyone who has spent more than five minutes around me knows, I am more likely to burst into song than anyone you know. I have acted since I was 13, and became a prowrestler when i was 18. I have always loved my creative side, and tried to find outlets for it.
Lately though- it is like I have run into a brick wall. Everytime I pull out a pen and paper, open word, try to sketch…anything. I seize up. I simply stare at my blank canvas like a deer staring into the headlights. Not useful for any activity- much less one where your mind needs to be active.
So, Brandon and I talk and we decide I needed to spend an hour a day doing something creative. Writing, drawing, practicing guitar- anything. I have tried to stick to this and have worked on the guitar (not as much as I should) and attempted to work on doing other things. But then it struck me- I was trying to force it out. I was trying to muscle my brain around. And my brain (much like me, generally) is very stubborn. When pushed, it doesn’t want to move.
I needed to exercise my brain. I had learned how much exercising my body had helped and made my body behave more like I wanted it to. So why not the brain. And that leaves me here- tonight. Brandon suggested that I start a blog- somewhere that I can come and just devote time to writing. Even if it’s just putting out complete non-sense, I exercise my mind.
Finally I did it.
So, this wasn’t the most entertaining blog ever. I know. But i wanted to explain why the sudden creation of a new blog.
Because, honestly, every story needs a beginning.